Thursday, 21 February 2013
Doing a lot of things badly.
When we try to do too many things, when we feel under pressure or underwater, no matter how good our intentions, our execution and delivery suffers.
I am simultaneously adoring life and struggling with stress and tiredness. Studying for the NCTJ is intense and demanding and I'm being pulled in, what feels like, at least 97 directions. There is never enough time to get everything done and there is always something to do. My television engagements, which I have always so dearly stuck to, are suffering terribly. I'm four episodes behind on Neighbours and don't even ask me who's left on Dancing on Ice.
There's PA and Media law revision, so much revision; there's shorthand practice, an hour a night; there's hunting down stories to pitch to The Argus - "you don't want to waste this opportunity"; then there's actually going to events and interviewing people and vox-popping your life away; there's the writing of stories and the writing of homework; there's the endless amounts of hole-punching and filing; there's reading newspapers, three a day preferably; and the journalism books that we simply must read; and there's blogging. We're told to blog, but I've always blogged, it should, therefore, be an easy requirement. The fact that I've always blogged though, for my personal enjoyment as well as for the opportunities it brings, means it's difficult to justify when I could be doing other work. I could do half an hour of shorthand instead of telling you how my day was or how much I liked or disliked the latest place I drank coffee. The result is a general somber average-ness, seeping through all my efforts and endeavours.
On top of all that (I know, cry me a river), I'm essentially doing a 9-5 and I've got to eat, sleep, and clean myself and my surroundings. Being a grownup is tough. Having a social life/getting to know the new people I'm around is an entirely outrageous notion. But I tend to ignore that bit.
Everything is a bit messy and a bit overwhelming, but so is most of life. I'm trying to work out how to prioritise, how to pass my exams and how to be happy. Not spending an entire day procrastinating on the Daily Mail sidebar (it is NOT research, Claire) would be a good start. For now, I apologise for the lack of blogging and the unfortunate lowering of standards, I promise I'll be good at writing again soon.
Posted by clairemaxwell at 19:09